Introspection galore

So. Yeah. Slightly awkward to write a post again when you made and broke the same promise in your last post.
Resolutions wise, I'm 0 for 3 right now: I haven't blogged at least once a week (obviously), I missed a week of gym because of I overused my hamstring again (might be time to go to a physio..), and as far as the JLPT is concerned I got as far as ordering the books. They now sit in a stack on my desk, waiting for me to man the f*ck up.

Yeah, not so much.

This is partly due to laziness and internet addiction on my part, but also partly due to Life and Things and Adulty-ness.
After the last post things became kind of sucky, then got better, then took another nose dive and are now on their way up again. Needless to say that I kind of had enough on my plate to do any extra projects, and basically had me wondering for a bit why I even bother.
It's supposed to have at least an element of fun: the blogging, the gymming, the grappling with Japanese... So why should I feel like I have to?

So I put it aside for a bit, and have now decided that (at least for this blog) I will post when I feel like it, and when I actually have something to say. It might be funny, it might be serious, it might be a review, it might be me getting on my soap box. The most important thing is that I enjoy the exercise of writing again, and I've missed that in the past while.
I figured out that I go into avoidance/procrastination mode when I put too much pressure on myself to regularly produce stuff to a certain standard, and start reverse-psychologizing the shit out of things in order to not have to get things done. Which is why I have decided to relieve the pressure a little of having to blog once a week, and having to be ready for JLPT in July. I can still take the test in December. It's not the end of the world, and really the only one who will be all judgyjudgyjudgy about it is myself.

On another note, this introspection extravaganza does reveal that I would be a horrible freelance writer. There is no way whatsoever that I would have enough self discipline and motivation for that sort of career. Kind of a bummer, because 'being your own boss' sounds awesome, but I guess it's better to 'know thyself' and all that.

Anyway, just a bit of an update on how things stand here in the land of unnecessary but unapologetic wordiness, in case any of you random citizens were interested.

Big hugs to everyone who's endured my ranting over the past few weeks, and stay tuned for next time when I extol the many virtues of Nutella porridge.